Christmas is over rated.

I am so over Christmas. O V E R I T. We decided to do "Christmas lite" this year and I can't even hack that.

Unexpected Grace

This Easter was our first Holiday post-diagnosis, and I was really nervous that it would put a focus on the fact that Kiddo is different. At the risk of repeating myself, it did occur to me that being the Easter Bunny, while allergic to eggs, to a kid who can't eat sugar or starch, was pretty hard! I probably should not have dyed the eggs (but I did, while breast feeding), and I really should not have made meringue cookies (but I did, between breastfeeding and bed time) and that didn't go too well.

When to be a Conversation Topper

In general I dislike, and discourage conversation topping.  You know what I mean.  You want just a little bit of sympathy, "My day has been so difficult..."  and the response follows, "You think THAT was hard?  Let me tell you about MY day."

Zen Entertaining and the art of faucet repair.

I hosted my first Christmas this year for my family, because my brother just wanted everyone together, and I am too pregnant to travel comfortably. It was going to be great. Perfect. Beautiful. The menu was set, much was preped ahead of time so I could relax instead of cooking, the decorations were beautiful, the house was clean, so what if the paint wasn't all touched up, and the closets completely cleaned out, faucet was a little loose, it's an old house. I could get to all of that later.

Top 5 Recent Fails

It can only get better from here.

I hope...

Picky Eater = Neurotic Mother

I was SUCH an excellent parent, before I had my son.  Back then MY child was (of course) never going to use a pacifier or watch television.  MY child was going to be polite and get along well with others.  MY child was not going to be a picky eater.

I was a totally rad parent, you know, before I was a real one.

Big Balls!

Sometimes Jenny is just so far ahead of the curve.  When her personal assistant was born I went to meet him, hold him while she showered, drink tea with my friend, do loads of laundry...whatever.  I just wanted to be there.  She had this crazy idea about making dryer balls from wool.  Apparently dryer sheets aren't good for cloth diapers, but wool dryer balls would work like gangbusters.  (CLOTH? you say!  I know, right?  But that's how she rolls.)  As I watched her wind them from wool yarn, wash them in hot water, and dry them so they would felt a bit I kept hearing this song in my head...

Love letters just aren't what they used to be.

I always dreamed of sending and receiving long love letters. You know the kind you read about in books, or find in a box in your grandparent's attic. Well, it ain't happening. I do however, exchange emails with my love on a regular basis, and in the spirit of Too Honest Moms, I will share this morning's email with you.

(You may not want to go any further if you don't have a strong stomach.

Rags to rugs.

I make a lot of scraps. A lot. I also have waaaay too much fabric in my once neatly organized craft closet. I needed a way to use them up, so I decided to try my hand at making some simple woven rag rugs.

Yeti Support Group

When I came down stairs Saturday morning with my hair down The Personal Assistant said "No Mommy! Brush your hair! Put your hair up! Go be right back!" And backed up to hide behind the Hubster. Apparently he does not like my hair down. Not. One. Bit.

Why I am "still" in my pjs.

So far my morning has consisted of getting up with a teething boy at 4:30. Coaxing him to at least lay down in his crib and watch Thomas while I crashed for a few more hours. Getting back up at 7:30 to screaming which lasted until 9:00 when he decided oatmeal would be acceptable (I loaded it up with peanut butter to help dampen the noise). Calling in a Rx refill to the pharmacy, answering work email, monitoring a call from The Personal Assistant to DiDi and Papa while clearing the dishes, then suddenly rushing a pooping boy up the stairs only to have an accident which resulted in a mess that took 1/2 hour and a dreaded bath to clean up.

Weekend Project - Homemade All-Purpose Cleaner

I have been brewing (literally) a non-toxic all purpose cleaner.  This process has lasted about a month and I have mixed feelings.

1-2-3

ABC, simple as Do Re Mi!  Yes I have the Jackson Five in my head today.  Remember when your baby was so small and you started to teach numbers?  Your baby looked at you with those wondering eyes, as deep as the sea, knowing that you were the smartest person on the planet.  And then...

Bad Mother Guppy

Today I am a bad Mom. A really bad, angry, frustrated Mom.

Futility

I have no pictures this time.  I only offer my exasperation.  You wouldn't want pictures anyway.

About three times a week I remind my 4-year-old boy to watch the whole time he pees.  The whole time.  Do not get distracted by shiny objects.  Do not dance.  Do not sing.  Do not try to do pilates.  Just pee straight into the toilet and nowhere else.

And about three times a week I clean up a pee-swamp from behind the toilet.

I have instituted rules that have failed immediately:

Creation

I love making toys and games out of garbage, or scraps, or bits. My son has an inspiration and I try to facilitate. "My Nutcracker man needs a lady robot to play with, mama!" Well, I've got Styrofoam, coffee stirring sticks, and bubble wrap...let's spend the afternoon making a robot in the sunshine because I'm a "great mom"!

When in doubt, blame your mother-in-law.

 

I am a good baker. Really. Truly. I promise. This cake SHOULD have been better. It should NOT have resembled a pancake in the middle.

Mystery Meal

Jen has her stuff together.  I mean it.  She can trim her budget, save time cooking, buy everything at once, and be set.

I used to be upset with myself because I would try to be that way and fail.  “Why can’t I be more organized?”  I’d lament.  I would try to plan ahead for meals only to chafe at the fact that, you know what, I really want meatloaf.  I do not care that it is July – do you hear me monthly menu? – I do not care!  January gazpacho?  Yes.